Season 9 · 2022

Week 5

The week

Box scores

QB Josh Allen BUF 36.16
QB Lamar Jackson BAL “Big Truss ” 15.76
RB Nick Chubb CLE 25.40
RB Austin Ekeler LAC “Your Dad ” 31.90
RB Melvin Gordon DEN “RoJo’s Backup” 10.30
RB Christian McCaffrey CAR “Comeback Christian Complete” 16.40
WR Tyreek Hill MIA 6.00
WR Garrett Wilson NYJ 2.70
WR Mike Evans TB 8.10
WR Courtland Sutton DEN “Sutton Deez Nutz on Ur Face” 7.40
WR Brandin Cooks HOU 2.00
WR Romeo Doubs GB 2.90
TE Robert Tonyan GB 2.30
TE Tyler Higbee LAR 4.60
FLX James Conner RB · ARI 6.30
FLX Tee Higgins WR · CIN “Pee Wiggins” 0.00
FLX Jeff Wilson RB · SF 19.20
FLX DJ Moore WR · CAR “Daddy DJ” 6.70
K Ryan Succop TB 8.00
K Justin Tucker BAL “Justin Fucker” 16.00
DEF Denver Broncos DEN 14.00
DEF Philadelphia Eagles PHI 4.00
Bench 50.98 42.14
QB Aaron Rodgers GB 16.88
QB Derek Carr LV 17.94
RB David Montgomery CHI 14.20
RB James Cook BUF 9.10
WR Curtis Samuel WAS 6.20
RB Mike Boone DEN 8.50
WR Brandon Aiyuk SF 5.80
WR Corey Davis NYJ 3.80
RB Tyler Allgeier ATL 4.50
TE George Kittle SF 2.70
RB AJ Dillon GB 3.40
RB Chase Edmonds MIA 0.10
TE Dawson Knox BUF 0.00
RB Chuba Hubbard CAR 0.00
RB Elijah Mitchell SF 0.00

Abe: best possible 149.86 (left 12.10 on the bench, 92% efficient) · Matt: best possible 126.34 (left 17.98 on the bench, 86% efficient)

QB Justin Herbert LAC “Busted Pervert” 14.42
QB Joe Burrow CIN 18.28
RB Rhamondre Stevenson NE 17.50
RB Dalvin Cook MIN 24.10
RB Kareem Hunt CLE “Supreme Cunt” 11.70
RB Leonard Fournette TB 25.90
WR CeeDee Lamb DAL “PeePee Slam” 5.30
WR Allen Lazard GB 9.50
WR Mike Williams LAC “The Glass Man” 13.40
WR Isaiah McKenzie BUF 0.00
WR Jakobi Meyers NE 17.10
TE Dallas Goedert PHI “Phallus Gaysquirt” 9.50
TE Travis Kelce KC 26.50
FLX Antonio Gibson RB · WAS 3.90
FLX K.J. Osborn WR · MIN 4.10
FLX Jamaal Williams RB · DET 5.60
FLX Elijah Moore WR · NYJ 1.10
K Matt Gay LAR “Fat Gay” 4.00
K Brandon McManus DEN 11.00
DEF Buffalo Bills BUF 14.00
DEF San Francisco 49ers SF 15.00
Bench 49.42 28.30
QB Jimmy Garoppolo SF 18.02
RB Michael Carter NYJ 15.30
RB Tony Pollard DAL 14.60
WR Chris Godwin TB 6.30
TE David Njoku CLE 8.80
RB J.D. McKissic WAS 3.70
DEF Baltimore Ravens BAL 6.00
TE Mike Gesicki MIA 3.00
WR Amon-Ra St. Brown DET 1.80
K Matt Prater ARI 0.00
RB D'Onta Foreman CAR 0.20
WR DeVante Parker NE 0.00
WR Jahan Dotson WAS 0.00
RB D'Andre Swift DET 0.00

Asher: best possible 125.82 (left 17.50 on the bench, 86% efficient) · Ethan: best possible 173.08 (left 20.50 on the bench, 88% efficient)

QB Kyler Murray ARI 17.20
QB Patrick Mahomes KC “Mahomosexual” 30.48
RB Najee Harris PIT 3.60
RB Saquon Barkley NYG “Gayquon Squartley” 16.60
RB Rashaad Penny SEA 5.40
RB James Robinson JAX “Gaymes Slobinson” 3.90
WR Ja'Marr Chase CIN 5.00
WR Stefon Diggs BUF 16.20
WR Michael Pittman IND 5.90
WR JuJu Smith-Schuster KC “BooBoo Piss-Pooster” 3.30
WR Diontae Johnson PIT 6.00
WR Devin Duvernay BAL “Devin Do-Be-Gay” 7.80
TE Gerald Everett LAC 0.20
TE Mark Andrews BAL “Money Mandrewz” 14.90
FLX Robert Woods WR · TEN 3.70
FLX Josh Jacobs RB · LV “My Dad” 25.30
FLX DK Metcalf WR · SEA 12.80
FLX Clyde Edwards-Helaire RB · KC 3.50
K Daniel Carlson LV 16.00
K Evan McPherson CIN “Evan McPhuckson” 6.00
DEF Dallas Cowboys DAL 23.00
DEF Tampa Bay Buccaneers TB 6.00
Bench 40.62 17.06
RB Kenneth Walker SEA 14.80
QB Jared Goff DET 6.86
QB Matthew Stafford LAR 11.32
RB Mark Ingram NO 3.60
WR Michael Gallup DAL 4.40
RB Darrell Henderson LAR 3.00
WR Drake London ATL 3.50
WR Joshua Palmer LAC 2.40
RB Cam Akers LAR 3.30
WR Zay Jones JAX 1.20
RB Brian Robinson WAS 2.20
WR DeAndre Hopkins ARI 0.00
RB Khalil Herbert CHI 1.10
WR Keenan Allen LAC 0.00

Blake: best possible 110.70 (left 11.90 on the bench, 89% efficient) · Hunter: best possible 134.08 (left 0.10 on the bench, 100% efficient)

QB Carson Wentz WAS 22.86
QB Jalen Hurts PHI “#RareBreed” 27.66
RB Aaron Jones GB 8.00
RB Nyheim Hines IND “Father’s handcuff” 0.80
RB J.K. Dobbins BAL 4.40
RB Alvin Kamara NO “glue factory” 17.40
WR Davante Adams LV 24.40
WR Jaylen Waddle MIA 2.30
WR A.J. Brown PHI 3.20
WR DeVonta Smith PHI “Heisman-Winner DeVonta Smith” 8.70
WR Amari Cooper CLE 13.60
WR George Pickens PIT “NFL Youngboy” 8.30
TE Dalton Schultz DAL 0.00
TE Darren Waller LV “Fraud” 0.00
FLX Dameon Pierce RB · HOU 17.30
FLX Jerry Jeudy WR · DEN “Jerry Poody” 5.30
FLX Miles Sanders RB · PHI 6.40
FLX Raheem Mostert RB · MIA 18.20
K Cameron Dicker LAC 9.00
K Tyler Bass BUF “Tyler Ass” 8.00
DEF Los Angeles Rams LAR 4.00
DEF Jacksonville Jaguars JAX 5.00
Bench 50.82 34.10
QB Geno Smith SEA 24.02
WR Tyler Lockett SEA 22.40
RB Travis Etienne JAX 11.40
WR Rondale Moore ARI 6.10
RB Rachaad White TB 4.20
RB Devin Singletary BUF 4.60
WR Russell Gage TB 4.00
DEF Los Angeles Chargers LAC 1.00
RB Alexander Mattison MIN 4.00
WR Michael Thomas NO 0.00
WR Robbie Anderson CAR 3.20
RB Jonathan Taylor IND 0.00
K Harrison Butker KC 0.00
WR Kadarius Toney NYG 0.00
WR Jameson Williams DET 0.00

Courtney: best possible 122.12 (left 8.96 on the bench, 93% efficient) · Dan: best possible 127.06 (left 25.40 on the bench, 80% efficient)

QB Kirk Cousins MIN 23.24
QB Tom Brady TB “Son Kisser” 19.74
RB Derrick Henry TEN 25.20
RB Joe Mixon CIN “His Year” 8.80
RB Ezekiel Elliott DAL 7.80
RB Breece Hall NYJ “RIP My Prince” 25.70
WR Deebo Samuel SF 9.20
WR Cooper Kupp LAR “Pooper Slupp” 18.90
WR Terry McLaurin WAS 7.60
WR Justin Jefferson MIN “my dad” 18.32
WR Allen Robinson LAR 1.20
WR Marquise Brown ARI “Doesnt play for the Browns” 13.80
TE T.J. Hockenson DET 0.60
TE Tyler Conklin NYJ 0.00
FLX Christian Kirk WR · JAX 1.10
FLX Damien Harris RB · NE “Mr Harry” 1.20
FLX Adam Thielen WR · MIN 2.70
FLX Chris Olave WR · NO “AllOf deez nuts” 11.40
K Younghoe Koo ATL 1.00
K Greg Joseph MIN “Kick God” 3.00
DEF Green Bay Packers GB 3.00
DEF Minnesota Vikings MIN 4.00
Bench 11.70 45.96
WR Darnell Mooney CHI 5.20
WR Gabe Davis BUF 29.10
TE Zach Ertz ARI 4.80
QB Russell Wilson DEN 11.16
TE Pat Freiermuth PIT 1.20
WR Tyler Boyd CIN 3.20
TE Albert Okwuegbunam DEN 0.50
WR Hunter Renfrow LV 2.50
WR Kendrick Bourne NE 0.00
RB Cordarrelle Patterson ATL 0.00
QB Tua Tagovailoa MIA 0.00
TE Kyle Pitts ATL 0.00
WR Rashod Bateman BAL 0.00
WR Julio Jones TB 0.00

Dominic: best possible 90.94 (left 8.30 on the bench, 91% efficient) · Tom: best possible 152.76 (left 27.90 on the bench, 82% efficient)